Goodbye

Oh, though oft depressed and lonely,
All my fears are laid aside,
If I but remember only
Such as these have lived and died!

~Henry Longfellow

Scared

I'm scared. I just don't know.

Laila-B is in the corner, typing away on her phone. I would ask her for the phone, but I'm not talking to her. Not after what she did.

This all, is just.

I don't know, I feel like there is no point in even trying to escape.

I'm just gonna be here.

Till I die.

Why?

Yesterday evening Laila-B came towards me, looking cute as ever, as I lay there in chains.

It began innocently enough with a hug. It was comforting, not something I felt I deserved, but I kind of liked her soft skin around my neck & the coconut smell of her hair.

"Are you sad Journal?" she asked as she hugged me.

I didn't respond, didn't know how I could. I assumed it was obvious I was sad.

"Shhh..." She said, as if I had said something.

She waved her arms and some black goo came out of my mouth. I would've yelled at her and/or asked her what she was doing. But, I couldn't.

I was speechless.

"You need to relax Journal" she said as she kissed me and started to fondle my breasts.

I wanted to moan, but alas no sound could be heard from me. I didn't want this, she could've just left me alone.

Eventually she moved her hands down to my nether regions, under my dress and started to rub a rather sensitive area of mine. I shook my feet, trying to get away but I couldn't. All I accomplished with this was rustling my chains.

I cried.

"This isn't happening!" I screamed internally to myself as I kicked around, trying to get her to leave me alone.

"You are so tense Journal. Let me help you!"

She now moved her head under my dress, pulled down my underwear and started to lick away. I tried to crush and kick her with my thighs, which she responded with by waving her hand again. The same kind of goo that had come out of my mouth before appeared before me. It pulled my hands and feet apart. I was just stuck in this embarrassing position.

"Relax" she kept saying.

I of course felt the sensuous feeling one gets from this act. But even that didn't make this enjoyable.

After she seemed to feel like she was done "making me relaxed" she put my underwear back on,unstuck me & even gave me my voice back.

I can't begin to describe how I felt. How I still feel, my face turned into a waterfall as she walked back to her side of the cell with a smug smile on her face.

Why did she do that?!

WHY?

Though...

I'm an object.
Maybe this is what being an object entails.
Even so.
This didn't feel right.

Lamp

I've decided to stop with the Journal format...because honestly I don't care anymore. Yeah, maybe Laila, the bad one has sucked a bit of joy out of me or all of it. Laila(the good one, who I will refer to as Laila-B from now on) is the only real person I have left in my life.

Maybe you are thinking I'm being overly dramatic, but I'm not...What is my life really? Tiger Stripes? I doubt that my brother cares that much for me anymore, I mean...if he did wouldn't he try to save me or something?

"But Journal, you've only made 7 posts things can't possibly be this dramatic at this point!"

What do you know about that?

Laila has me in her dungeon,  there's no escape because I'm chained to the wall and Laila-B is not really helping me either, just sitting there being adorable. While that may help in some circles, it doesn't help me now.

I wanna cry.

I should be stronger than this, but I'm not.

I'm not Journal.

I'm not anything from Rapture or anything else.

I'm not even a person.

I'm an object, I don't deserve to have the title person even.

I'm Julia, just as worthy as a book or a lamp.